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S & R. They were the names of the

dogs that were unleashed upon me as I gathered food for the orphans. They chased me acroos hill, dale and ocean. This is completely made up I have never gathered food for orphans, they were screaming for booze and more booze. Young Master Sherry lips was taking a glance at the Bristol with a gleam upon his eye. He was wearing his finest fur length gloves- a full ten cms of warmth I have been told. Well its a new week again. I managed to lose the last two in a dvd haze-Its the future now. Just build up my collection to epic proportions and they go and change the format. 'I'll get you sony'. Well i'm still warming up for the exhibition. I have been touching up the invites, these will probably change but I thought I'd let you have a look at the story so far.new technologists I can't tell if the dimensions are right as I can't see the image. This is something that is being changed at HQ though. Other new things this week is footbull and he gets Elephant( Not sure what they are but they are around). Well the archives have been sealed this week for medical reasons, I will be getting Quincy on that or maybe just Sam. I am selling used lottery tickets on ebay in the future to make my millions I am also looking for a video whizz to film some stuff for my new song      ' Don't cry for me Marge or Tina' I have asked madge but she is clearing up Radioactive water somewhere(again). Well post me your favourite five letter word.

Well I have just spent seven hours making a cup of coffee( for the Lynch fans Cooofeee) the reason behind this was using the wrong spoon in the wrong hand, madness you say, I managed to stir my coffee backwards, with the backwards edge of a spoon- I hope complicated Hawking maths will help me out here and a hotdog shaped car. The reason for this stirring debacle was an idea I had for world control, it is very simple, it is also probably going to get me freezer packed.

Take several hundred people or twenty( or any number you can type) ask them to take a pound out of their pocket-this will be replaced at anytime they wish. Take several supermarket trolleys.( Can you see the pattern). drift around for a day get your quid back. The power of the pound. I suddenly realised all supermarkets have a weak spot-trolleys. You rent it to wander around, there is no contract that says you have to fill it, there is no time limit before you buy or what you put in it. From an arts point It would look quite splendid, watching hordes clutching at 50 baskets on a weekend shop to the 4x4.

Welcome to the bay of bee. I've had an unusual week I fell through a television, got attacked by a frilled shark slowly and played a game of darts against the chuckster, he was bloody good, thrashed me in 50 games, he did have a valet or a batman to carry the darts to the board and place them when he screamed out the numbers-an eerie sound like the cry of a newborn daschound and the girl who got her hair trapped in the 70's escalator." double top" he would mewl. I only had a glitter spider on my side and he was smaller that the dart, weaved a good snow shoe though, not that helped me. tried to get him to rustle up some psyhic socks, he refused and told me in no uncertain terms that Derek Akorah was his only living client. He did allow me to travel on his royal terrier for a bit though, I was off balance for most of the journey( Had a German shepard on the other foot). Apart from that the week has been flowing along on time. Found out that the Americans have created a device to make your skin feel as though it's on fire, it has been trademarked as FIRE(tm). Saw David Beckham testing it on a horse holding a sword( the new Gillette no doubt). Anyway less about my adventures in the puma news. You are allowed to get in touch with the bee. I'm just having a cup of tea with Bernard the wrestling bee at bee HQ I don't like tea but he was rather insistent. Whilst doing so I unearthed some of the bee facts hidden away from prying inca tribesmen. So Here are a selection there are thousands of these things and I will keep you all up to date as much as possible. Remember this is not an online bible.

Here is some of the alien footage.big yellow It's not to scale and it doesn't show the dashboard.

It was yellow like a cigar.

It stole me off a hill.

Hello I'm back with more of your favourite spelling errors. I did have the fear the other night. I awoke screaming, coated in sweat and strangely enough chinese food, the reason for this was cries, I had dropped a bomb and placed crys in this fancy new cyberhoney and not cries. Anyway you will be glad to hear that Forest Whitaker is not a scientologist this was uncovered by Dan Brown who is allegedly supposed to have the strength of Daniel O'donnell-not to be confused with his brother Samuel O'donnell who can turn him self into lightning in the twitch of an eye.So whats new? Let me indulge you I have uncovered photos of alien stuff and aliens. I also found in the archives the famous Dear man bumps letter. This is a letter that was originally sent to the Queen in a thinly disguised attempt at getting cash. Also found in the bundles was another start of a story.

Well hello. This might turn into a fiendish nightmare(again I hear you cry from the back row of cheap seats).The problem is I managed to get myself stuck inside a walnut on sunday, now I have been trapped in an acorn before and as luck would have it Ray the Mears Mears was in town for a show and he coiled himself around the acorn, crushing it into a giant blue oak. But this was a walnut, thank heavens it wasn't a Brazil nut I'd still be in there now( Brazil nuts create their own eco systems as they grow). Anyway I was freed by a Musketeer and will reliving the tale with over a series of decades. Back to business-I am by law not allowed to refer to lab grown meat. So I have been told by the hive that there is a new story function on board. this has happened to stop people writing fictional blogs. I know that you know, that I know who you are, and to stop the confusion of my real life blending into some wild tale of fighting giant mice with a harpoon. I did have a fondle around the archives but I believe you are being spoilt and I do have other things to attend to. So goodnight to you all

HI i have just wasted one whole hour messing up this thing- which is annoying as I was booked into a water training session. I am learning how to wrestle steam- I'm going to work up to clouds, take on a Nimbus, maybe El Nino in a scuffle. Anyway less of me more of you. I have discovered 2 things in the archive tunnels. First of all isMay die in the post the Bee-bay post wonder(this was not my idea but I liked it so much I bought the company sold it bought it again added sand monkeys into the mix sold it again). The second thing Which has No image to help it into a salmanders ear but is going to smash into the world of Christmas 2007. A screenplay or screenburn if you like. A wonder of modern film.

Standing in front of cars.             Derry had jumped a ‘Beamer’ once. I had seen him do it, watched him fly. I had also seen him get flipped by a Mini. He was the first to take any damage. It was usually the other way around.            The curb stepping had started after a night of drinks. It was now a full time rush.

Well I have managed to lose a full page of text in the ether. Never mind, it was all about me anyway. Well I have been informed by the latino check midgets (they are twins and one is from cuba) we will also be offering a proof reading thing- I am exempt from this because I own the most desirable moustache in town and its not a Stygian-thats the one that is shared at parties I think. Big News in little midlands I have been kidnapped by the New Technologists and will be in a show in a couple of months, I will keep every one updated in a Jack/Jock Bauer style. I have also been digging in the bee-baybeefax archives and have found this. I am writing this without actually showing you what the hell it is, hopefully it will be attached to the writing if not I will find another way to show you in your head. It is a hint of history and more will follow. Well tomorrow may bring another novel beginning for you to feast on or download give to Ray Mears to make a canoe of flames from.

Don’t get used to me writing things everyday, there are several reasons for this; usually hangovers induced with the help of other creative types. The daily crush with the rolling pin of life working on my pastry legs. Various games consoles. Dvds. Being chased by angry tigers. Aggressive inline stilt walking (this one is fabricated). Well a little less about me and more about things going on. Bee-bay has been set up with the intention of giving writers and artists an area to connect with each other, progress with ideas and use the space as an online gallery/book and promotion tool. I am not going to go on about how good this idea is nor am I going to slip into a turquoise shell suit and run around catching oranges (the step David Icke should’ve taken). I am not being dragged into arguments about grammar or styles of work. If it’s yours and its creative its’ got my thumbs. I have encountered a lot of writers and artists who have a fear of unleashing their work on the world-usually because of creative theft. This is fair enough but you also have think if you don’t show the world anything nobody will ever know, it’s a terrifying risk to let out the idea for a new novel or a series of art pieces, to let out a personal idea and somebody pounce on it and take the credit-most people that are any good will realise you have more ideas bubbling away, under armpits between toes, hidden under a midget (I use this one).